1. We think at least two of your friends are hot.
2. Men don't know how much we really eat. Really.
3. We'll take nice forearms over six-pack abs ANY DAY.
4. Turning into our mother is an inevitable fear we live with on a daily basis. Calling this to our attention at any point is a terrible idea. Just don't do it.
5. Sometimes we just complain about "that time of the month" so you'll leave us alone.
6. If you ask for our number a second time and we don't give it to you, there's a good chance we can't remember the first number we gave you.
7. Don't try to figure out what will make us happy. We have been trying to get to the bottom of that mystery since the beginning of time and we have no clue either. 
8. Men see what women do, but they never know what women think while they are doing it.
9. If you stop with the compliments, then so might our efforts to look as hot as we did when we started dating. Why should we spend time and money that we don't have excess when our target audience doesn't even notice?
10. If we offer you gum, it means we want to kiss you later. It's not an insult. Just take the gum.
11. Don't be too obvious, but that low-cut top -- we wouldn't wear it if we didn't want you to look. Just be discrete about it.
12. When we ask you how we look, we are really saying, "I am needy, please validate me. Please tell me I'm pretty. Please tell me you don't regret loving me."
13. Strong women still like shiny things. Even feminists want kitchens with stainless steel appliances.
14. There is NO excuse for rudeness. If I see you treat waitstaff or cashiers poorly, that's it.
15. Making us laugh is priceless. You should be more concerned when I stop thinking your jokes are funny than with how often I want to sleep with you.
16. We like to show you off. Sometimes we bring you to dinners, parties, and events just to be able to say, "That one is mine." Remember that.

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